Your Computer is a War Zone. I’m Looking for Sarah Connor. And Not Any Bullsh*t TV Show That’s On Today.

These movies are:

“The Libertine”

“Live Nude Girls Unite!”

and

“Short Circuit”

Now, ok… they have a right, I suppose, to not carry every movie ever made… to my disappointment, but let’s see, they chose, a 2004 movie starring Johnny Depp? to remove, over, say, The Toxic Avenger by the Troma kids, seeing as how that is such a classic piece of art, or so well made, or such a profound statement of the human soul? Which, I’m not saying it isn’t. It definitely is. I identify with the toxic avenger, man… He knows my soul. But I’m getting off topic.

No, what this is is the guy at the top of the pyramid, with his one green greedy smiling eye, deciding what the rest of us can watch. This is evil, this is indsidious, and this is much more pervasive, and definitely much more f*cking dangerous than you probably realize. After all, what is it they’re censoring?

Let’s see, “The Libertine” I believe, is the story of Lord Byron… at least I think so, I haven’t seen it, and my computer is acting a little poorly right now. It could be because MICROSOFT Internet Explorer is a piece of crap, or that my computer is too slow to run GOOGLE DESKTOP keeping all of my library book info online all the time, and my calendar with everywhere I'm going to be and all of my contacts, or just some basically all of my PERSONAL INFORMATION sitting on my computer is taking up too much of my precious hard drive that things just inevitably get lathargic and dumb, I mean SLOW, so I can't look it up on Internet Movie Data Base, but I remember the preview.

Byron was a poetic badass. This movie, from what I’ve seen about it, chronicles him writing some badass poetry, having some wild sex, and disrupting society.

So, let’s move on, since none of us do any of that, and would never want to hear about anyone doing anything like that.

OK: “Live Nude Girls Unite!” Ah, now this is much more our style. We would pick this title because it sounds like sex we can CONSUME. Oh, but it’s not. This movie is about the exotic entertainment industry and how the “strippers” formed unions and became strong enough to be treated as human beings… or what have you. Anyway, a positive movie. But we wouldn’t want this to be remembered by history. We would much rather have “Zombie Strippers” which, I think, should also be kept, if for no other reason than that it takes place in a town called “Sartre”. Awesome.

And our third SOON TO BE REMOVED by Netflix movie (I am writing them a letter right after I finish writing this (Better safe than sorry) and telling them I am cancelling my account with them unless they CHANGE THEIR BEHAVIOR. And that I have plenty of free time to mount a campaign against them and other people who create software with liscenses allowing them to forcibly install anything on people’s personal computer that they want… Oh, sure, just go ahead and download Google’s new web browser “Chrome”. Check out the license agreement before you do. It practically lets them own your computer if they decide to become bad guys. Anybody seen “I, Robot”? Will Smith will save you. Willn’t he?

THE THIRD MOVIE:

Short Circuit:

A movie that shows technology revolting, resisting, rising up, as something alive and human even! As something that can fight, and even cause harm, kill, and yes, even, itself, die.

I’m going to hang up this phone now..

oh wait, nevermind

SYSTEM FAILURE

- The Neon Heart ( NE<3 )

"What if he makes it?"
"Nobody's ever made the first jump."
"Yeah, but what if he does?"

"War is Peace
Freedom is Slavery
Ice Cream is Good"